I like the idea of being a writer. i also like the idea of being a programmer. I spend a lot of time reading about what this and that person did an invariably putthem on a little bit of a pedistal. After that I stand back and say "that person is cool. I wonder if I could do something cool like that. I know, I'll takesome notes and then when I get a chance I'll make something must as cool."
Nothing comes from just wanting and -at this point- my dreams are only hurting me because I see these people and only see what i lack versus what i can bring to the table.
I feel like im hurting and i dont know if I'll ever heal.
I tell myself it ok. That I can get up and do something more with my life but it feels like all my breaks are simply to break even.
I need help.
I need some kind of guidence.