Should

I’m someone who says a lot of things about self improvement. And I have to say that I’m a much better person now than where I was 10 and 20 years ago.

This doesn’t mean that I’ve hit all my goals but it does feel good to know that I have made progress.

Unfortunately, it feels like a lot of the things that were promised as the American dream are just outside of reach. That I’ve squandered a lot of the opportunity that was in front of me. I hurt myself with the word “should”. I “should” have a house. That house “should” be big and go with my luxury car. I “should” have an astounding career. I “should” be in great shape. “Should”, “should”, “should”.

The expectations hurt.

I’m reminded that I shouldn’t “should” on myself.

It “could” be worse.

I am grateful for the things that I do have in my life both material and not.

The ability to simply take this time to write this and see my thoughts is comforting in that I know that when the future me sees this…

Well, I don’t know.

But I do know that I will be kind and understanding that the present me was doing the best that I could.

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